What Lib Dems say versus what Lib Dems mean

If you're a Lib Dem MP and you think I've got this wrong, then please feel free to let me know.

When you write to your local MP, it’s not always easy to decipher their response, particularly if the subject matter is contentious or simply one that they’ve not fully grasped. Replies tend to be full of soothing platitudes and very rarely offer any kind of direct action. Half the time, it’s unclear whether your MP even agrees with you or not.

You may well have noticed this if you have asked your Liberal Democrat MP a question about the right of women to single sex spaces – the chances are it left you none the wiser.

I recently came across an example of what can only be described as a baffling reply to a constituent’s question. It’s tempting to metaphorically screw it into a ball and throw it in the bin. I mean – who’s got the time to engage with this level of nonsense?

Well, it’s Sunday, so I’m taking one for the team and going in. Paragraph by paragraph, let’s look at what Liberal Democrat MPs say versus what they mean.

Thank you for getting in touch with me about single sex spaces, I know this is a complex issue with strong feelings on both sides. 

Oh, for god’s sake – another letter on single sex spaces! I have no idea why these women won’t just give all their stuff to men. I’ll use the old “both sides” ploy to get things started. Nice and neutral.

I’m sorry that it has taken me so long to respond – I hope it helps to know that I did meet with Liberal voice for women on this issue on the 11th of September, and I listened carefully to their thoughts.

I’ve ignored you for as long as possible, so I’d better come up with something. Now that Liberal Voice for Women have had a conference stand, I can probably admit that I’ve spoken to them. They did make a lot of sense, but all the blogs on Liberal Voice say they’re a bunch of bigots, so I’m going with that. It’s not worth risking my career for.  

The Liberal Democrats exist to build and safeguard a fair, free and open society, in which we seek to balance the fundamental values of liberty, equality and community. We champion the freedom, dignity and well-being of every individual, and we reject all forms of prejudice and discrimination.

Quick copy/paste of a paragraph from my standard letter template that will make you think the Lib Dems care about you and your rights. Doesn’t commit me to doing anything, obviously.  

I am committed to tackling violence by men against women and girls, which is far too prevalent in our society. We have been campaigning hard for misogyny to be made a hate crime; for the Government to ratify the Istanbul Convention and uphold internationally-agreed standards for preventing violence against women and supporting survivors; to improve age-appropriate sex and relationship education in schools; and to ensure better training and more resources for police, prosecutors and judges – so survivors are listened to and supported, criminals are punished, and victims get justice. Women’s rights are very important to me.

What was this letter about again? Oh yes, women’s rights. Copy/paste the caring-sharing women’s rights paragraph here. How’s that looking? Yes, that’ll do, nothing of any substance that I can be held accountable for delivering.

I believe we must ensure the safety, dignity and wellbeing of all people. We are committed to upholding women’s rights and trans rights, and do not believe that the two are in conflict.

Oh, wait … I can’t mention women’s rights and wellbeing without including everyone else. Better call out trans people specifically – don’t want all that DEI training to go to waste. That’s better, now it’s properly inclusive.

Liberal Democrats believe that individuals and service providers should be given more clarity over how to make decisions that are often very difficult and sensitive. The Government should publish clear and comprehensive guidance on the use of single-sex and separate-sex exceptions under the Act, using worked examples and case studies from organisations providing these services.

The problem is – although we do know that blokes in frocks and lippy are blokes, it’s really rude to tell them that you’ve noticed. And we’ve committed to pretending that we can’t tell.

In the meantime, Lib Dem councils are telling service providers that they can offer single sex services, but they have to pretend that nobody knows who is male or female any more, so we’d like Jamie on reception at the leisure centre to implement the safeguarding stuff for us. Jamie needs guidance on what to say to Dave (who calls himself Dawn on Thursdays) because Dave wants to join the women-only swimming session. And Dave gets really cross if Jamie says he can’t go in because it’s women only.

The aim of that guidance should be to ensure that everyone who needs single-sex services – such as survivors of sexual violence or domestic abuse – can access them safely, to prevent unjustified discrimination against trans people, and to provide clarity and certainty to service providers and the public. It should be produced in consultation with those most likely to be affected, including women who have experienced sexual violence or domestic abuse, trans people and providers of single-sex services.

The guidance we’re looking for will explain to Jamie that women are entitled to their single sex swimming sessions that are definitely women only, and that Dave – whoops, I mean Dawn – can use them too. Because, you know, TWAW. But those sessions are very definitely single sex and the public must be confident of that. We advise the government to consult with women who have experienced sexual violence or domestic abuse. And Dave. Or if the consultation session is on Thursday, Dawn.  

I certainly agree that the debate around this issue has become far too hostile and toxic. I hope that, whether you agree with me on this or not, you will take my response in the same spirit that I took your email: as part of a good-faith conversation about how we can ensure everyone’s safety and dignity.

The reason everyone is so cross about this is that people like you disagree with what LitEraLLy EverYOne knows is the right side of history. I’ve given you enough of my time now, and any other points you make will be taken as a bad-faith arguments on your part, so don’t bother. I won’t be answering any more of your emails.